To be honest, I don’t have much to say today. The day feels heavy, and the cloudy weather is kind of a perfect match. I’ve written over the last few days how I’m feeling, and I’m still in the same place. It’s kind of dark here, but I can see her better here. When the sun rises tomorrow, she’ll still be there but tucked away a bit. I carry her urn and her footprints everywhere I go, so she’s always with me – whether I’m at school, at the store, or at home. I even bring her on vacations with us. I’ve had to explain at Disney once or twice that I don’t intend to attempt to have her join the “999 happy haunts” at the Haunted Mansion – she doesn’t belong there. She never got to see it with her own eyes. She belongs with her mama, and with her mama she stays.
So today is a day of quiet, a day of grieving. I sing to her, I read to her, I think of her. (Am I crazy? I don’t think so.) I hold her as a member of our family, despite the fact that she can’t be here in body. I share the peace and quiet of home with her and remind her that one day, hopefully well off in the future after her brothers are both grown and living their own lives, I’ll see her again.
Rest well, my sweet ladybug.
One Miraculous Mama 
Through your words I feel the heaviness, the weight of your grief and also recognize its place. The child who is there but not physically is apparent. “She belongs with her mama, and with her mama she stays.” The clarity is arresting because few among us know how to talk about loss with this level of candor.
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Your words capture the weight of grief and the enduring bond between a mother and child. Your words beautifully express the depth of your love for your sweet ladybug. Wishing you moments of tranquility and the strength as you continue to navigate through this difficult journey.
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I am so very sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers on this dreary and sad day and in future days as well.
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I read, listened, and felt with you. I respect and honour your ability to stay within your feelings and moments. To just…be. Sending you so much love through your loss. There is nothing to say, specifically. Just know I can help carry the tide of emotions.
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I am sorry for your loss. Grief has its own timetable and everyone’s grief has its own set of rules. Give yourself the grace to do it your way – whatever brings you peace.
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Oh my, you have to hold a lot. My heart aches for you and your family. May time bring you peace and lessen the ache a little bit more. Thank you for sharing something so hard!
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So tenderly felt and written. Thank you for touching my heart today. I’m sorry for your loss. The little purple dress speaks volumes.
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This line is such a powerful line:”The day feels heavy, and the cloudy weather is kind of a perfect match.” — Your whole slice conveys the heaviness of loss, and the ways in which you both grieve and continue life. Your writing is beautiful.
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